and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
You can't date a girl from every country.
I'm the captain planet of women
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
I nicknamed her "Jackhammer" for the way she gave me a handjob. My balls were in constant pain
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
the wedding party just walked in to the song eye of the tiger. i'm getting drunk.
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
Have you ever forgotten how to pee? I did last night. Standing in front of the urinal with dick in hand. WTF were we drinking???
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
Of course he’s picking me up at the airport. I taught him the Lotus position last time we had sex.
Randomize
