everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
Just because I tried to backhand you with a fist full of cash does not make me violent
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
Life just isn't the same without him waking me up at 4 in the afternoon with a look of pity on his face...
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
She was purple for Halloween. She literally spray-painted herself purple and called it a costume. It won't come off.
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
25 likes of a picture on Instagram of my butthole. beat that.
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
Having Father’s Day on Pride weekend is always so awkward. “Hey dad just calling to say I love you.” While I’m navigating my way through a pop up pool at a bar riding a penis floatie. Happy Father’s Day.
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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