What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
She looked at me and said "i like penises." and then passed out with her condom balloon animal in her hands.
Telling someone to make good decisions on a Thursday is like telling Santa to be Jewish.
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
I felt like a responsible adult. A responsible adult that may or may not end up shitfaced. But not heaving purple puke into a urinal like last time because I'm classy now.
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
Turns out the grown up version of seeing your teacher shopping is seeing your therapist is on tinder
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
I woke up wearing mittens dude
I woke up in my bathtub with the potted plant from downstairs.
checkmate.
Apparently I told the mayor I want to be a trophy wife
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