nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
rolled over to window for cup of snow instead of leaving bed for water. that's how hungover
i just saw you make out with a girl with facial hair...just thought i would document that in case you forgot
Apparently campus cops frown on lighting a joint off of the eternal flame on Jerry Falwell's grave...
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
Mom looked at me, frowned, and said "it makes me sad to see you drink before noon.." So i told her if she doesn't like it she needs to stop waking me up before noon.
They only searched every other person. But I sacrificed myself to get our vodka across the border
id like to think im the only pot dealing prostitute that is also an ordained minister. but maybe not. what a time to be alive
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
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