Ugh now I'll have to carry around an overnight bag to all the bars I visit tonight. but hey! maybe I'll meet a dude! And need it!
and then I told him he looked like the Gordon's Fisherman dude. I don't think he thought it was funny, because he 'forgot' to pay for my beer.
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
I face planted right in front of a cop. He looked at me, shook his head, mumbled "freshman" under his breath, helped me up and told us to get home safely. I love college.
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
Drunk girl in a bikini just tried to bite my face, it's officially spring break
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
We also had a full on debate about how realistic and useful teleportation and time travel would be...and only used Twilight Zone episodes as "scientific evidence"
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
I just lifted up my shirt to scratch my stomach n a Dorito flew out of my pullover n it legit scared me when it hit me.
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