if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
Woke up chewing my pillow from a dream where I was scarfing Cajun pasta from TGI Friday's. That's a new level of fat, even for us
Luke did at least 8 shots of pure mayonnaise last night. I am not sure if that is better or worse than my 2 cement mixers?
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
The waitress asked if you wanted white or brown, and you said "Isn't it all the same color when it's toasted?". She stared at you for about 20 seconds before she decided that you weren't fucking with her.
I'm just going to eat my milkshake, watch teen wolf, masturbate, and lament my inability to form meaningful relations with men who aren't gay
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
Randomize