You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
Strawberries are so good its weird that food is growable
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
you're just mad cause i madeout with you while having a mouth full of chewed pretzels
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
You did this to me with your delicious pizza and moonshine.
I'll forgive you once we're drunk again by noon.
You're either a hooker or Beyonce. Beyonce is abnormally good at doing everything in heels
I want a MapMyFart App, where I can mark every spot where I have ripped one. Like here.
He sent me a poorly photoshopped picture of his shaved dick wearing a Hot Dog on A Stick titled "Shorndog"...
Also, there's the possibility of falling 5 feet to your death to make it more exciting
In which case I will yell FIVE SECOND RULE and continue to slam you
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
Hey! Happy Birthday! Could you do me a favor and bring my underwear to the bar?
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
Randomize
