Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
i no longer even have beer goggles. i'm pretty sure i blacked out and had beer lasik.
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
Housekeeping called in a homicide detective. Just spent an hour explaining that we had vigorous hotel vacation sex five times, even though I was having a heavy flow day. It'll definitely be what you call a memorable honeymoon.
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
Dear, was it your thong we found wrapped around my hairbrush next to Rachel's bed? Please explain.
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
It has been so long since I got any action that I have decided to change my vagina's name from "the chamber of judgement" to "the cave of forgotten dreams".
His baby mama found the pictures of us, she couldn't see my face but she could see my asshole. So I'm safe.
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
Like when your most normal sex dream is you being a prostitute, you know it's been one long ass dry spell.
Man the amount of drugs being done at a wedding with a bunch of surgeons was disturbing
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
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