So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
At the hospital. Forgot we locked Eric out of the house last night as a joke. Hypothermia's a bitch.
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
the night ended with taco bell and tears
You know how the doctor said I need to stop being vegan unless I find a way to get more protein? There's protein in beer. The doctor wants me to drink more beer.
I'll just be sleeping in this laundry room. Come get me at bar close.
i have to vacuum my washing machine now, asshole
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
I invited him to my hotel room via snapchat. I'm one hell of a classy bitch
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
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