at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
Theres a note on my antibiotics that says "Do not chew or crush. Swallow whole." I think that would be a good tattoo for just above my penis.
nothing screams I HAVE A PROBLEM! like the case of miller lite sitting on top of my DUI papers in the passenger seat of my car. lol
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
Reason #57 I am going to fail the bar... it's Tuesday and i'm drunk at Toy Story 3.
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
4pm update. Theres smashed cake inside my duffel bag, a vodka bottle in the dish drainer, and the most productive thing ive done is make 40 pigs in a blanket
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
I want to play lord of the rings tonight. And by that I mean get really drunk, potentially lost, and go trekking through the woods or climbing shit. I want all of you there. You are the fellowship. This is a mass text. I am insanely high.
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
Randomize
