Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
Why did every guy I have ever slept with have to come into the library today?
no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so.
A stripper just got mad at me for saying goddammit. She's in no position to lecture me on morality
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
Right... Let's keep my vodka tinged mind focused on simple words
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
I woke up on my girls floor with a pound of muenster cheese in my shirt pocket
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
you fell asleep with her panties on your face. how are you surprised??
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
I'm having to shit out rocks
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