I tried to gradually lead her into my room but she wouldn't stop crying and quoting memoirs of a geisha
I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
I fear hooking up with people who have white pillowcases because my guyliner always smears on it and i either have to A. sneak out in the night or B. wash it and see them again
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
Just stabbed myself in the face trying to lick melted cheese off a kitchen knife.
sick fucks of a feather flock together
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
My passport was stamped in Canada two weeks ago. One step closer to uncovering wtf happened that night
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
It was dumb but not something to force me into sobriety
His face matches his life choices. Both are train wrecks.
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
Well shit I mean if you get a bunch of cashed up drunk lesbians together in a casino, it's bound to go south at some point
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
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