Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
She described it as "a squirrel being hit by a hurricane"
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
We still need to grow old, buy a house, and drink 40's while wearing old people sunglasses, staring at the young studs mowing our lawn.
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience.
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
Talked a police officer into driving us the 1/2 mile home from the bars because we didn't want to walk. I never knew the back of cop Cars had plastic seats.
His name was Dragon. For real. How do you not sleep with a Dragon? Don't judge me.
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
So I forgot to ask, how was that bartender you slept with two weeks ago?
Google chlamydia.
I'm so stoned. We're making Josh's sister bake us brownies. She's so small and pixie like. Her brownies make me cry tears of happy.
Randomize
