this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
Walk of Shame today included voting.
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
She was surprised when she saw all our living room furniture was made from old kegs. It's like she's never met us before...
This time, try to not get fingered in the middle of the living room.
I DIDNT GET FINGERED
I was rubbed
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
I'm watching my cat lick a used condom wrapper on my nightstand and I'm too hungover to move and do anything about it. Tequila Tuesdays can not be a thing.
ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
Randomize
