Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
booty call
i swear to god if you come over i will kick you in the pussy.
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
I'm drinking with 3 chicks and 1 gay dude. 100% chance I'm getting laid and 75% chance I'll enjoy it.
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
Im in mikes bed telling my vagina I'm sorry in advance.
Okay. How did someone manage to piss on TOP of a urinal? What giant is roaming around with a prick five feet from the ground?
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
I literally just skipped to the fridge when I realized we had enough vodka left to get day drunk
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. She asked how my day was going and it got hard.
I admit I fucked your best friend, but to be fair, you fucked the tristate area. So there's a good chance about 40% of those people are MY friends.
Randomize
