So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
we need to stop having unprotected sex.
ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.
I've banged too many servicemen's wives to still be considered an American.
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
Marking my student's "don't do drugs" posters while simultaneously texting my dealer, is this what being a grown up is like?
Last thing I remember is ranting about hating pants. Woke up this morning pants less. Couldn't find them, decided to leave. Driving without pants is surprisingly liberating.
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
Hot fire fighters installing my closet. Don't know how to go about this. Gonna nonchalantly take my shirt off and see what happens..
Randomize