I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
dude she looked like Newman from Seinfeld I'm done with this wingman shit
I gave him 3 xanax and recorded the ball drop. He's gonna think tonight is New Years.
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
We just started the day with vitamin bombs. Daily vitamin + whatever's left in your glass from last night = feel like a champion
I just can't deal with that sentence
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
Guess who woke up with a hangover this morning? The same person whose parents found out and woke her up by banging pots and pans with wooden spoons.
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
ok NEVER tell the strippers its your birthday. i think i have to burn these clothes and take a bath in bleach
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
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