i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
Just opened a bottle with my rape whistle. At least it's finally getting used for something.
You broke into someone's house and stole a pan of lasagna.
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
Okay! I've got my sketchbook, my purse, my coat, and a knife hidden in my cleavage. I'm ready for to meet my blind date~
Also txt me when you take your first dump of the year... I'd like to synchronize if that's at all possible.
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
Life seems so much brighter and more vibrant after you have sex with a 20 year old. It's like how Kansas was in black and white and Oz was in technicolor.
Looking through last night's sexting, realized one is a haiku..
He deserves a nobel prize for his dick-giving abilities. 10/10, would ride again.
Randomize
