you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
He showed up to the Seder drunk and tried to convince everyone that he could read Hebrew.
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
I wish you would just come have sex with me in ihop. I don't want to be here
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
tell her thanks so much
It's a low moment when you're looking at your girlfriends tits on your daughter's phone..
Good news. That bum you thought that died is alive.
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
After my second liter of German beer, nothing D-cup or larger is safe near me.
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
Randomize
