evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
I sent him pictures of just me in my thong and he replied "you're so sweet, you make me feel special <3".... Oh.
Went to work in the same clothes from last night, completely covered in glitter...I didn't choose the hag life, the hag life chose me
I just got a lap dance from a sexy cop in return for giving him his sunglasses back. I think this is going to be the beginning of a really great friendship
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
Randomize
