Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
The best revenge is premature balding
Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager.
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
these are times I'm glad I'm Jewish because the Torah is just like "drink, eat, and fuck"
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
Randomize
