You're a womanizer and a bitch.
I have to brush my teeth today to feel like I did something.
She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
the girl next to me just texted someone in her phone named Optimus Prime
...i wonder what he did to earn that nickname
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
Woke up with his dick on the side of my face, it's like he passed out mid-mushroom stamp.
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
I’m home. Please don’t call me unless you have an arterial bleed or you’re on fire. Love you 😘
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