So the bouncer told me I could leave the easy way or the hard way. I told him I was going to make him earn his 10 bucks that hour.
Apparently you chose the latter.
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
You told me you loved me after I brushed your teeth with my index finger.
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
Listen you let me know what you're doing after drinking rum punch all morning
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
... Okay, fine. But I don't want to be a better person tonight. I'll be a better person tomorrow.
Sorry you ended up in detox. It's not my fault you decided to walk downtown in only your underwater at 3am. I think the tequila took over.
Randomize