Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
Well call me tomorrow, it's a great story that may lead to me being fired and/or possibly being buried in a shallow grave somewhere out in wine country.
I was more obsessed with the sweat stain on her back that was simultaneously shaped like a vagina and the virgin Mary.
On our way there. Drinking my beer out of a coffee pot. Cuz it's my bday
dude, you declined head because you wanted to tell her about how you put cinnamon in your weed. also, we're low on Chef Boyardee
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
im trying to look as sober as possible but i just poured orange juice and mayo into my milkshake.
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
Idk what y'all are doing but I just want you to know I'm home and if I hear him say "slap it" one more time I'm moving out
it's unicorns you uncultured swine
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