and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
i wish there was a 'silent except for booty calls' volume level on my phone
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
You wouldnt be able to explain the can of green beans in my mailbox, would you?
You know it's been a while when you're having to resort to positive conditioning to get women
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
I convinced every single one of my cousins to bring me a glass of wine. I was the alcoholic queen and they were my subjects.
Last thing I remember is ranting about hating pants. Woke up this morning pants less. Couldn't find them, decided to leave. Driving without pants is surprisingly liberating.
Just came to the realization that what I thought were orgasms were just lightheadedness from hyperventilation. My entire sex life is a lie.
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
The day I let him eat me out will be the day that Donald trump is an honest, kind, non-bigoted member of society
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