all i remember thinking as i was puking my intestines out is : wow.. this toilet does look like it's from the future.
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
Chasing shots with sriracha-covered mini toast was, in retrospect, not the best idea.
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
My night was too much. My morning is even more. Help. I need to teleport the fuck out of here.
I almost drank vegetable oil. Where were you? I needed you.
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
I achieved maximum drunk last night. It was pretty extreme. Woke up on a couch, outside, in a suit
I see you listening to my get shitfaced playlist on spotify. glad we're on the same page tonight there's a drink waiting for you downstairs.
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
Woke up to I'm AWESOME written in purple crayon all over my walls. I love drunk me
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
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