anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
I told my rommate that he was pissing on his bed. He said "ok man" and took a step backwards and continued. He then went back to bed.
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
I woke up to ritz crackers on the lawn, a keystone behind the hedge and puke on the rental car... i think that we have become that house...
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
I peed glitter this morning and had a beard drawn on my face with eyeliner. Last time I do shots with gay Dan.
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
It's like every time I'm baked I discover my fingers all over again.
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
Im so unlucky if I fell in a barrel of dicks, I'd come our sucking my thumb
Randomize
