I want to stick my p in your. b.
What the hell do I have to do to get some foreplay around here? This sucks.
I think you know the answer.
How can I marinade myself in Vodka?
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
You used the best tools you had at your disposal.
Slutty, slutty tools.
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
Its okay, i dont mind you drinking, im just surrounded by it, there is some random dude laying on your couch with a bucket that ive never seen before
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
New life goal: fuck in the shopping cart
He made me a flamingo drink and now I don't know why things are the way they are.
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
Randomize
