I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
I stayed at the bar and helped clean up cause I was told I'd get free shots. Didn't happen.
I found the bottle of ketchup and sobe you tried to hide in the middle of the lawn last night
I woke up this morning and the lid to the back of my toilet was missing. Dahfaq do I do with this shit?
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
Its 8 in the morning and I wouldn't pass a breathalyzer test, How's your day been?
My doctor said I can only have one drink at a time, ever, from now on. My life has officially started its decline.
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
And remember people can't hear you kick ass in space
Randomize
