What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
bet u 5 dollars u can't guess were i woke up this morning
oh god.. jail?
better, on the catwalk of the auditorium
I wish i could call my weed and hear it ring. That's how i found my phone.
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
I yelled at the cab driver to slow down because my unborn children live here, and pointed to my uterus. I think my message was lost in translation though because he immediately offered me his card...
I feel like my foot is being amputated. Or maybe it's the vodka. I couldn't tell you.
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
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