summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
Last night i was gna tell u about how i was watching project runway & how i was upset bc they replaced tim gunn & heidi klum. but then i realized that i was watching mythbusters.
True life - we need to smoke together more often
I just saw a girl walking home wearing a tshirt, boxers, and cowboy boots. Thanks for having the decency to drive me to my car.
in hindsight, the duct tape banana hammock was a bad idea.
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
It might've been him telling me last night that he "doesn't even need beer goggles to fuck me." When I thought that was sweet, I realized something needed to change.
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
I started scrolling back in our texts looking for context and a picture of your dick rose like the Great Pumpkin in the middle of my screen.
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
We just stood there eating chocolate chip pancakes, watching you sleep on the bathroom floor.
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
THERE IS A MOTHERFUCKING HUMMINGBIRD FLYING AROUND IN OUR HOUSE RIGHT NOW HOW DO I GET IT OUT????
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
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