is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
the fact that he forgave me for making out with the bartender is proof that i can fuck my way out of anything.
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
Mom just posted ur drunk pix from Cancun in the newly made "My not-so-fantastic son" album. Thought you should know.
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
My parents are coming to visit the 28th. How bad is it that I put a reminder in my phone to "hide sex toys"?
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