We're like a lot better than the average bears
i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
I just farted at work and tried to cover up the noise by shuffling papers around
we're taking shots every time my dog licks his penis. we're on number 8 now.
you should have been aborted.
he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
You know we had a good night last night when today I opened up my Google Translate application and the language is set to Persian and the phrase to translate is "I want you to suck my dick".
Why the fuck did I wake up in a chair with mouth clamps?!
Is adulthood just morning sex and then walking through the grocery store 20 min later looking for something to take to work for lunch?
...and then running into your dad at said grocery store...
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
The true debate: do I prioritize going to bed and getting more than six hours of sleep or do I prioritize washing out various grease, leaf bits, and jizz out of my hair
if I was a good friend this would be the time that i would remind you that you have a boyfriend
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
Randomize