What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
Just drove through Taco Johns wearing a drug rug and no pants. When I rolled down my window, the girl paused for a minute before saying "um... 4.07"
your like the ambassador to my penis.
Dude, I checked into a cathedral... I thought it was a joke, until I found a candle and a whole bunch of coins in my purse
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
I’m photoshopping my boobs to up my Tinder game. I need better dick in 2020
Randomize
