I would go down on you faster than GM stock
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
My therapist said that she thinks i may have a sex addiction. I think she may be a terrible therapist.
Want me to drive you to Dr. Drew's sex rehab?
Nah, cause then i cant masturbate to that show anymore.
i just checked to make sure valentines day this year was on a weekend assuming ill want to be drunk all day
hearing about your life makes me feel so good about mine
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
I take back everything I said about communal showers
I don't want to talk about her cat for two hours only to dry hump till I'm blistered. Not worth it.
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
My whole house smells like Spaghetti-Os and cat litter. I think I've failed as an adult.
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
Hi I love you will you be up for a while!
That exclamation point was a drunk decision
Randomize
