I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
Sorry you had to hear me puke. I didn't know I called you. Was it graceful?
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
I've come to the conclusion while folding laundry and watching porn that I may be dead inside.
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
I wore a firefighters hat and drank beer all night. They had to drive me home after breaking the beer pong table, they told me I was welcome back tonight though...
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
Dude. When are you coming home? I'm laying in bed watching the Grinch and trying to pet a cat that I'm not even sure exists.
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
I'VE LOST MY DIGNITY, MY PRIDE, AND EVEN MY BOOTY CALL. HAPPY THANKSGIVING.
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
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