Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
And by "got a tattoo" i mean i got a tattoo in the dorm bathrooms with a guy using his cousin's tattoo gun.
Im so excited to get permanently banned for life from all the old bars again, it is gonna be christmas after all
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
I'm truly not mad that he's at a strip club, it's that he couldn't look far enough into the future to figure out how to get himself home from one
And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
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