I didn't shave. On purpose
Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
He compared my vagina to the first time he tried cocaine
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
I went eBay shopping last night. Turns out I brought a Viking drinking horn. I can't even be mad.
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
Nothing like sitting at your midterm pissed at yourself because you put your graphing calculator batteries in your vibrator and forgot to put them back in before the exam 😑
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
My mother is currently smoking weed with a dying bee so his last moments aren't miserable. And she wonders why I rescued a grasshopper missing a leg.
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