I just high-fived this girl after she swallowed.
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
Dad says your scarf isnt fooling anyone and u look like a douchebag, its literally the perfect time to tell him your gay
You are a magnificent human being. I love you from head to toe. This wine is DELICIOUS.
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
Can't beat it when the local bar sends you off with a loaf of bread on the way out the door.
It wasn't until I lost my earring that I realized "I've been here before". Turns out we fucked a year ago. We've decided to make it a tradition.
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
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