And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
i woke up to my roommate spraying cooking spray on my legs. fourth time this has happened. not cool.
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
She checked into foursquare right as she left work so he would think she was there late and not on some other guy's dick
I have to say for barely passing high school, that girl is a genius.
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
1st rule of birth control pills: do not stop taking birth control pills. 2nd rule of birth control pills: do NOT STOP taking birth control pills.
The cop let me finish my J before he cuffed me. Coolest arresting officer ever.
He just took a bite of each taco bell burrito and hid them throughout my apartment. this was 2 weeks ago and have found 30 burritos so far
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
wtf I can't believe that bar tender told on me to my mom
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
Randomize
