At what point did I decide it would be a good idea to fill my contact case with vodka
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
What do I wear to meet his family/put his dog to sleep? Is there even an appropriate outfit for this occasion?
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
Im in my back seat in my own drive way with two beers left to shotgun and watching the sunrise. Am I over her yet?
Was banging my ex last night when his roommate walked in... We kept going. #goaheadandwatch
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
I brought a travel sized bottle of baby powder and sprinkled it on all of the couples making out on the wall in the basement
hooked up with someone last night while wearing walrus pajama pants. clearly I'm accomplishing big things in life
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
Randomize
