Sober January is a disaster.
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
What happened to my face?
You kneed yourself in the eye during the Harlem Shake.
It was impressive.
Today was my cousin's Kindergarten graduation. I happen to also think of it as a MILF convention.
Note to self; if you can light it on fire, you probs shouldn't drink it
It’s 830 am and the amount of Valentine’s Day snaps I’ve already seen makes me either want to vom, drink a bottle of wine, or buy chocolate
1000% No lie I was just looking on insta and was thinking about taking a bottle of wine to the face..
I know I drink too much cuz "ssssjllapph peneinssesss" automatically comes up in my phone now.
I’ve officially bought the ticket for my future dick appointment 😂
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
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