i felt like cinderella. except at midnight i turned back into a whore.
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
I am laying on the kitchen floor eating cold chicken fingers and drinking wine. welcome to my new years party.
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
It started as a joke and ended with a trip to the emergency room, a broken macbook and a gigantic hole in the concrete of my driveway.
I found him with a guitar and his kitten in his room. He was singing a song he'd titled "you're a cat". Guess what most of the lyrics were...
She told me she's dating him because his apartment is a block from Taco Bell. I don't know how she's not fat.
I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk
Stop calling dibs on everything with a vagina you jackass.
That should be the title of my autobiography.
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
so i was about to call you for your birthday but then i started making out with this guy... and i feel bad but i felt like you'd understand
Randomize
