Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
genius idea. im gonna paint my penis green like the serpent of sex
My 40 year old neighbors are throwing a party for their eight year old niece's birthday. It's 1am and they're still partying hard. Harder than me. It's Saturday. Just say it, I'm a disgrace to the generation.
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
There's jack Daniels coming out of my eyes instead of tears.
Everyone at work loved my story about sobering up in a river with no bra on.
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
Dude so last night I was eating out my gf and her kitten climbed onto my back and fell asleep. AND SHE DIDN'T NOTICE FOR LIKE 10 MINUTES
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
What's an appropriate gift to bring to my boyfriend's wife's baby shower?
Shame?
Randomize
