Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
rhymes with "ouble enetration"
i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
I'm glad the dog doesn't judge me for doing leftover lines and watching George of the Jungle at 10 am
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
hey, you wanna get together over coffee or something?
is this code for 'i just got broke up with and i need a sympathy dicking'?
how did you know?
There's cereal in my underwear. Was I in your apartment at any time last night? That's the only logical explanation for this.
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
My dad called me in the middle of the night, drunk on vodka, asking for references on the Irish alphabet.
She drunkenly texted me about Japanese mythology at four AM. I think I’m in love.
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
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