Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
three words: i give head
three words: not that well
If I knew losing weight would mean this many fucking creepers I would've just stayed fat.
Haha, you kept saying the cop was going to give you a ride home b/c "that's his job, it's summer."
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
She's posted my bail. Twice. Of course I'm going to be her wing girl.
We have so much sex to catch up on
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
You said you couldn't use your body anymore so you made me push the buttons on your phone while you made alien sound effects
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
I had one beer! ONE BEER! They took shots in mourning of my tolerance last night. My ability to drink is a joke.
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
Randomize