I want to give you a handjob with my mouth.
help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
I just found a bottle of gin in my vegetable crisper. Party is back on.
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
He stopped in the middle of us having sex and asked "is today Monday?" then went even faster
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
I just got dropped off by that cop that pulled you over. Best sex ever! Consider that $140 ticket my birthday present.
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
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