Dude, no matter how drunk you are, it's not okay to hug every other guy at a strip club. Mainly because boners are far too common.
We walked through the hotel lobby in slow-mo taking huge steps because we were astronauts, and astronauts obviously can't be drunk.
Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
For some reason I knew you were going to smell like strippers and burritos when I hugged you.
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
i woke up the next morning in a pool of blood in my bathroom and a pinata donkeys head in my bed
so much for an anticlimactic 22nd birthday
For Valentine's Day I've purchased six lighters and I'm decorating them for him. I'm on a full ride to an art school and this is what I'm using my talents for. An intervention is needed. Please stop letting me date stoners.
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
I got a blow torch for Christmas. You are now permitted to be afraid.
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
Randomize
