sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
I just gave some chick my debit card to put in the jukebox. She better put out.
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
He just asked me if I wanted a ride on the "bologna pony." I never wanna have sex again...
Do you know how disconcerting it is to hear the sound a dog makes while it drinks water and find out that it's someone eating you out?
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
If I make it home without being sick in this captain's hat it will be a fucking miracle.
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
You're a wizard. You are a master of disguise. You are beautiful. I love you.
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
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