so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
Then she called me a home wrecking whore.
dont they live in a condo? that doesnt count.
Couple in the hotel room next to me keep fucking. When I hear her get close I call the room wait for them to stop and hang up. If I'm not getting any tonight then no one should.
You told me you would ride a pig into the night sky screaming, "I wear my sunglasses at night"
So they found him after the wedding still dressed up in his feather boa and top hat passed out in a bush...
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
I balled in the shower for 20 minutes, rolled up to the meeting late looking like a gremlin, and my one night stand was standing there in a suit
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
In hindsight, maybe rearranging his living room because he has OCD while he was out wasnt the greatest idea. Though it'll keep him busy for HOURS
Randomize
