how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
she makes me feel like im THAT guy in the taylor swift song
She woke up laying on my kitchen floor, ketchup bottle as her pillow, in front of my fridge.
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
Random thought: what if being devoured by animals was a death penalty option...and you got to choose the animal?
I smoked that joint really fast and now I'm so high I'm crawling around on all 4 giving my dogs piggie back rides pretending its the macy day parade for dogs and I'm their giant human float.
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
I knew things were bad when my gyno recommended meditation.
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
On your day off do you wanna get wine drunk and take a few episodes of Jerry Springer way too seriously with me?
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
Randomize
