Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
He doesn't know I'm infertile yet, that's when the sex gets good
my mom noticed the "toothpaste" stain on my tshirt...she repeatedly attempted to get it off by licking her thumb and rubbing it. See Jenn it obviously doesnt taste that bad...
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
Ohh god. I'm so nervous. This is terrible. He just introduced me as "the best girlfriend of his life" and Jenny as his "sexual roomate"
My TA just came over to give us drugs. Now he's drinking grey goose with my roommate and explaining his thesis to her. This is too much.
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
How do I tell your little brother I lost my virginity wearing nothing but his socks?
Formal letter or email.
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
This is either going to be a hilarious catfish or the fuck trophy of the century.
Randomize